Hey everyone,

Happy Jewish American History Month. Not a day goes by without seeing my identity in the news, and nearly all of it framed in hatred. Who exactly do I call to free Palestine?

Somewhere between Harvard releasing the hottest read of summer—a 311-page report on antisemitism on campus that will probably only be read by Jews, bureaucrats, and academics—and the next round of demonstrations, I decided to take a beat. The whole situation makes me physically ill, particularly stomaching the misdirected anger coming from all directions. The actions of a few have landed on the shoulders of all, and it is a heavy burden.

Even if you spent the rest of your life tallying up who did what to whom, it wouldn’t matter. Both sides are suffering under poor leadership, and U.S. taxpayers—uninterested in playing “Whose Biblical Land Grab Is It Anyway?”—are tired of footing the bill. Call it ‘both sideisms’ all you want. It’s just a fact.

To many Jews, the chronic looming fear of annihilation makes it unfathomable that no one would want to protect us. Meanwhile, many outsiders just see violent settlers overstepping their boundaries—enabled by the Israeli government with weapons of mass destruction. If it was simply about the hostages, they would be returned by now, Smotrich wouldn’t be insisting Israelis get used to the term “occupation” and Netanyahu wouldn’t be facing re-election. It almost makes me want to make aliyah just to vote against this shit.

The complexity of the situation tugs at me as a Jewish American, especially the way it has placed a chokehold on the diaspora—a minority that is a little touchy about its collective existential dread after having 6 million wiped out and still needing to defend that it actually happened.

I’ve been to Israel. On Birthright. Not because I was dying to make aliyah or find my bashert. I went a few years after college with the full awareness that I was being paraded around by a tourism board with an agenda and while I was the only person who didn’t hook up with anyone, I was probably the only one who came home and got fired by her Jewish employer. Still, the trip meant something.

What struck me most wasn’t the political messaging, but how sad it is that American kids of other backgrounds don’t get that same opportunity to connect with their cultural heritage. I met individuals of every background—Ethiopian, Sephardic, Mizrahi, Druze, Bedouin, Russian, Arab—and saw a complex, messy country. But it was also the only place I’ve ever felt uniquely safe as a Jew. And it reminded me: you can’t flatten a people or a place you’ve never actually known.

It doesn’t help when Hollywood anti-Zionist Jews like Hannah Einbinder and Ilana Glazer try to wipe their hands clean of Israel while doing fuck all to acknowledge the hostages or address any actual antisemitism impacting everyday American Jews—many of whom would probably agree settler violence is disgusting and support land back and right of return. Their half-informed truth-telling often ends up enabling more harm than help.

On the flip side, you’ve got AIPAC/ADL Hollywood Jews doing cheesy PSAs that sidestep valid criticisms about settler violence and instead deliver a flat, embarrassing defense of Israel that alienates everyone further. Either way, we’re screwed.

Today, addressing antisemitism feels like a full-time job I never signed up for. Remaining silent would be easier, but antisemitism wasn’t part of the inclusion section in DEI programs. The alternative is letting everyone else speak on my behalf, so now I’m the one explaining why sweeping generalizations about Jews and a place most people have never visited are unhelpful, and why antisemites come in every color and tax bracket. Thank god I have so many allies looking out for me; I’ve never felt so safe and privileged right now (that was sarcastic, by the way).

Coming out as a Jew with opinions has been a weird journey. Friends and readers aren’t sure how to feel about having an opinion that doesn’t neatly check a bunch of boxes without sounding like "genocide apologist" or veering too close to anything they’d dismiss as “Bible stuff.” But if we’re not collectively aligned, how can we achieve success? Just ask any social justice movement ever.

So, where do we go from here?

First, let’s clarify what antisemitism is. That includes calling out the non-Jewish antisemites who keep trying to redefine the term as a way to erase and delegitimize us. I get that to some, this feels small in the face of children being bombed. But those of us facing legitimate threats of being beaten or killed for something you have no direct involvement in, your perspective shifts. And that perspective sees a whole lot of daily online harassment directed indiscriminately at the first Jew or mention of Judaism that can be found with very little room for discourse or nuance.

This extends to college campuses, where some pro-Palestinian activists have used harassment, intimidation, and alienation against Israeli students and faculty—including Israeli Arabs and Muslims—as documented in the aforementioned Harvard report while others turned a blind eye because it inconveniently detracted from their messaging (though technically on point as the Iranian government gave it a thumbs up). Harvard even ran ‘privilege trainings’ that labeled working class Jewish students as more privileged than their wealthier peers and I guess no one thought, “You know, that might be a touch antisemitic.” The problem, as the report itself makes clear, isn’t criticism of the Israeli government. It’s how some people went about it.

Same story with Kneecap. The ask to “Please stop promoting actual antisemitic texts from Hezbollah while disrespecting Nova Festival victims at Coachella” was immediately dismissed as a Zionist conspiracy theory to destroy free speech rather than reasonable request to stop fist bumping literature with a whole chapter called “On Jews” referring to us as “descendants of apes and dogs” to a fan base who thinks, “Well, maybe they have a point.” For people who claim to be deeply intersectional, it’s stunning how many feel zero urgency to address antisemitism—or worse, think it’s justified.

Jews are also pretty touchy about the phrase “globalize the intifada,” given that some survived routine suicide bombings and aren’t crazy about the idea of joining forces on bringing those back, hence why R&B star Kehlani keeps getting her shows canceled but seems genuinely confused about it. Personally, I don’t think canceling her concerts is helping us in terms of public optics, reducing these threats, or enlightening anyone who has already put us on mute/block—and I’m going to give her the very generous benefit of the doubt that she, like many other pro-Palestinian activists, is just misusing the term. But then again, BDS is known for doing this exact same shit to Israeli and Israeli-adjacent artists, so I guess the solution is that everyone has to shut the fuck up.

Of course, Zionists with bigoted views exist and abuse the term antisemitism to shut down valid criticism. Fundamentalist Religious Zionism as a political force is a very different beast from the secular interpretation of Zionism. And yes, there are Jewish assholes—because that’s not unique to Jews. Every demographic has them. Defending those people against discrimination based on an ethnic identity I share doesn’t mean I’m endorsing their views. Just like many Palestinians likely feel impossibly torn between condemning Hamas and simply trying to survive.

I grew up during a much more optimistic period when a post-Holocaust world meant a post-antisemitic one, and where we could all agree that genocide is a bad thing. Yet here I am: explaining to young people on the internet that yes, it happened—and no, the current Israeli administration being led by destructive whack jobs doesn’t change that.

As someone who spent years fighting for abortion rights, safe clinics, and secular choice, it really trips my shit up watching my identity get tossed under the bus by the same organizations I supported after deciding to martyr themselves over Palestine weeks before the last election—and then predictably getting defunded. And now they’re mad the government didn’t bail them out, as if any of that aid would have gone towards abortions. Please.

These were always under threat. Just ask Cecile Richards and RBG (RIP, just like our rights). It wasn’t Jews taking away your reproductive rights—and many of us had automatic monthly donations to help hold the line. Now we’re being cast as oppressive monsters? WTF. If every girl making up the nearly 200,000 members in "Are We Dating the Same Guy NYC" put $20/month into NNAF, abortion providers would be flush with nearly $4MM per month alone. If you’re divesting from "Israhell" orgs, then surely you’re ready to pick up the slack, right?

Adding insult to injury, some of my favorite so-called feminist icons have said absolutely nothing about Israeli women brutalized on Oct. 7. Nothing. And I watched some of my friends and lovers openly celebrate those atrocities in real-time. That will never sit right with me. Ever. Last I checked, feminism isn’t about being selective on who deserves to be sexually assaulted or believing survivors based on their passport.

Einbinder, who decided to throw on a “Fund Abortions, Not War” shirt this week featuring the highly contested inverted red triangle and a red keffiyah (that is actually Jordanian) and effectively pat herself on the back while scapegoating Jewish donors in the wake of all of this, deserves all the flack she’s getting for that bullshit. (Her skin looks great, though!)

Antisemitism has gotten so bad in the past two years that it’s impossible to ignore. Yet, I’ve heard more people defending themselves against being labeled antisemitic than speaking out against it. Here’s a hard truth: leftists can be antisemitic. Assimilation won’t save you from that realization. And if you’re not willing to do the hard work of explaining antisemitism to your friends, someone else will fill in the blanks (and it won’t be pretty!). Get ready: you might be surprised and deeply disappointed to learn which of your friends really don’t give a shit!

More than one thing can be true: the devastation in Gaza is horrifying. So is the settler violence that fuels it. So is Hamas. So is the way the diaspora has been abandoned by people who used to call themselves allies. The ultra-right Orthodox weaponization of the word "Zionist" has obviously overcomplicated things for people who can’t seem to grasp that the mainstream Jewish interpretation of Zionism is a shorthand that the state of Israel should continue to exist—versus the Evangelical Christian interpretation calling for a Zionist majority state to usher in the Rapture and second coming of Christ. It’s all patriarchy at work.

I don’t like deportations—not just because they’re morally wrong, but because I really hope I don’t get deported to the Rapture, seeing as Evangelical Christians are hoping that’s the Final Solution. I like Israel fine, but this is my first home. I believe in Jewish self-determination and safety, and also that Palestinians deserve land and return. I believe violent settlers should be removed. I believe everyone deserves elections. I also believe that if peace was that simple, it would’ve happened already. I would like to get back to fixing our planet and creating a better world and stuff.

What I won’t do is disappear and be gaslit into silence while the right-wing twists our pain and the left ignores it. If your liberation doesn’t include Jews, it’s not liberation. It’s just a different form of erasure.

In the meantime, the rest of us are out here smiling nervously while wondering, “OMFG is this over yet?”

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